Red Rose, Black, Words and Music By Brian McCaskill

Words and Music by Brian McCaskil

Peace

January 27th, 2003
Lets try this again.

Ok, here we go, ahem. BUCS BUCS BUCS BUCS BUCS! Its about fucking time one of my teams came through, seriously. Problem is, now there will all these fake Bucs fans, hey, I was a fan since 1985, and thats nothing to be proud about. Either way, if you want to call me up and tell me how great my team is, go for it.

Katie, Dylan is not one of my kind. I'm not ashamed of anything. Dylan, for a man as successful as he is, is always ashamed. He was ashamed to be a Zimmerman, so he changed his name to Dylan. He was ashamed to be a folk artist, so he went electric. He was ashamed to be jewish, so he went christian, only to be ashamed of that, so he went back jewish. He was ashamed to have black hair, so he went blonde. Odd thing is, the one thing he should be ashamed of, his new movie, he isn't. I mean, fuck the 2 hours I would have wasted on seeing the film, I want my minute back I wasted watching a clip on Brian's computer.

So, one week down, another to go, how depressing.

Best Superbowl Commercial, the Bud Horses having the review, and the ref was a zebra, classic.

Best Superbowl Halftime show, tied with Saturday Night Lives, and Shania Twain's breasts.

Yeah I said it.

So anyway

January 25th, 2003
Going to Rutgers tonight, hey Brian, perhaps I'll give you a call, if not, I'll catch you next time I'm there.

Princess Bride was on last night, if you haven't seen that film, then you are not an American. Well, at least you shouldn't be one.

Boscov's blows, you can't put shit in the aisleway on sale, and then say you are out of them, you blow Boscovs. You and your chocolate go to hell.

For one last time, lets go Bucs. To get you all in the spirit, if the Bucs win the Superbowl tomorrow, I'll make it free to read the site for a whole week, no charges.

Seriously.

Later.

January 24th, 2003
Hey hey its the weekend, people say we weekend around! I don't know what that means actually. Either way I slept about 10 hours yesterday so I'm up for some shit tonight. Don't think there is going to be much shit going on though.

In tennis news, the final set of a match the other day ended 21-19. Not that you care about tennis, but a good set ends 7-5, or something, its some pretty weird shit, so I figure I'd mention it.

Airbrushing out cigarettes, how silly, really, they must have know it would have pisses people off, but who did they expect to please.

If you don't understand that last tidbit, read Brian's page. I'm not going to explain in order to promote cross rant reading. Though I'm sure my page is the least read.

I saw Dave Chapelle's show, Chapelle's Show, and it was hilarious. At least the last fifteen minutes was, I was late. I won't say too much, but there is a black white supremicist. Thats a white supremicist who is black, if that was confusing.

I have never played piano before in my life, but in the piano class I have, I'm the 2nd most experienced, I feel sorry for the teacher.

I'm 22 and 11 months today, 1 month left of youth.

Later.

January 20th, 2003
BUCS BUCS BUCS BUCS! WHOO HAW! Sure, none of you give a damn, but the Tampa Bay Bucs are in the Super Bowl, beating the Eagles handily yesterday, suck on that one.

Still nothing like George Constanza, me that is, I'm nothing like George.

Come to the Java Joint tonight, Nico is playing, not me though, which is a good thing.

I'm too tired to type anything else.

January 18th, 2002
Don't listen to Brian when it comes to movies, he thinks "Don't Look Back" is the greatest comedy, mystery, action, drama, porn, and science fiction movie ever, all in one.

Its just a coincidence that he liked the Two Towers, which did happen to be good.

If you had no clue what Brian meant when he said "Katie updated the site," your not alone, either did I. However, then I remembered that Katie was this person who used to write here, I totally forgot, who knew?

In one day, it has come to my attention that Boscovs sucks, and apparently some other people do too.

Not that way pervert.

Wood...chuck...orange...water...drink.

Hell hath no fury like college students bored.

Well, break is basically over for the 1.5 other males on this site (if you are wondering, I'm not calling one only 1/2 a male, I'm calling them both 3/4 of a male) and tonight was the final late night of the staff here, also known as "The Fearsome Four." Why, well we don't know really, but people do. Either way, it was the last night, for about a week or so probably.

Well, Britney and Fred are probably going out, let me tell you what I think of that.

January 16th, 2002
In a few days, the Bucs will play the Eagles in the NFC Championship game. Lets go Bucs.

Yeah, I know you don't care, fuck you.

The "Forty Licks" CD by the Stones is pretty good, you should buy or burn it, or steal it I suppose, but I don't suggest stealing.

You should also burn John Lennon's Greatest Hits for your friend, and by "you" I mean Nico Santo Domingo, and by your friend, I mean me.

Lobster for 9 dollars, hot shit, hot shit.

Well, I can't even think of useless shit to write right now, so I'm out, goodbye Ruby Tuesday.

Yeah, I know its Thursday, but I just burned the CD yesterday.

January 15th, 2002
Pete Townsend is a sick fuck. Well, Nico doesn't want to cast the first stone, and either do I. However, I have no problem casting the 2048576th stone. According to Fox News, Townsend is under suspicion for producing with intent to distribute child porn as well as the possession. Now, I understand his defense, "it was research" and he wanted to see how children are drawn into child pornography, and in his defense, apparently he reported his first purchase to police as research. The only problem is, I understand why he would want to see how easy it was to obtain this type of material, but why did he feel the need to keep it all on his computer after finding out? And if the production part is true, well, then there is no excuse.

However, I am a man about freedom, so until shown otherwise, Townsend is only an alleged "sick fuck," if proven innocent then he'll be cleared, much like Micheal Jackson was.

In a related story, George W. Bush is quoted as saying his choice of "Won't Be Fooled Again" by the Who in his campaign does not mean he supports child pornographers.>BR?>BR? Burning "40 Licks" by the Stones right now, old Stones stuff good, new Stones stuff, well, lets just say "not so much."

Joseph Leiberman is running for President, he is a true moderate. He has all the values of a hardcore conservative (defense, censorship, strict religious beliefs) but calls himself a democrat. See, a little from column A and a little bit from column B.

The weird thing is, the way our country is, we are probably more likely to vote a black Republican than a black democrat (or jewish, or female, etc).

A Bee Gee, Maurice, died the other day. When it comes to death, taste in music is not important, so we send our condolences.

...

January 9th, 2002
Sorry, I'm a few days late here, but happy "Someday We'll Laugh About This" week. Seriously. If you have seen The Daily Show, they do this thing where they sometimes bring up stupid holidays this month. Coincidentally, next week is "The Sad this is, but Naming These stupid weeks probably cost the government millions of dollars" week.

I rule in pool. However, even when I don't do so good, you should still take my advice. I won't lie to get you to lose, in fact I'm insulted you'd think that. For example, last night I didn't play so well, however, on three occasions, my advice was ignored, and the shot was horrible. I won't name names, but it was from 50% of this site, and Nico was on my team.

I saw the movie "Snow," and yeah, you should watch it, because, hell, why should I be in the only one to have to sit through that?

In a good way of course.

Quick question, when satellites get knocked out of alignment, and your cell phones don't work for an hour or something, how do they fix it? I sincerely doubt they realign the satellite. I personally think its all a scame, since nobody could really question out of line satellites.

Maybe I think too much.

January 7th, 2002
First off, a thanks to Rick for signing the guestbook. Even better, he gave feedback to Brian's rant, so we know he actually read it, so that makes 1.

Brian, unfortunately I think Rolling Stones has a point with Shakira. Personally I don't think she has more to do with women in music because she is too new. But, if they are talking about influencing young girls to go into music, they are partly right. Face it, Shakira, and other pop females are more visible and will reach more people. Also, a majority of women in music are in Pop, and were probably influenced by it, not punk despite how much Madonna tries to look punk.

One question though Brian, if you hate the Justin Timberlake cover so much, why is it hanging on your wall?

I think I realized this already, but after a second look, I will confirm that film New Years Eve parties are a bad idea. Some shit just shouldn't be said, and its much harder to not let anything slip when you are drunk.

Well, today is the nicest day of they year, and there is still snow on the ground. For Christ's sake, throw us one mildly warm day, please.

About Schmidt was good, I think, I forgot the plot.

Heard perhaps the worst joke in awhile, so of course I must share. Ladies, would you marry a guy whose last name was Semens, hmm? Don't know? Well, think long and hard about it.

Sorry.

Ndugu

January 3rd, 2003
Is it me, or has the weather this year sucked? Well, if it is just me, you're a fucking moron, because the weather has sucked, and you should know that.

Something has to be going on tonight, seriously. God can't hate me that much.

Along with Nico, I also saw, "Some Like it Hot." And they weren't joking when they said Marilyn Monroe was a big girl. I mean, she's not real fat or anything, but she did have a little pudge. She probably couldn't get a role today. Its weird how just 60 years that much has changed, hmmm.

Either way, the weather has made it depressing to even update, so not much for today.

...

January 1st, 2003
First update of the new year. Now we can all look forward to about 3 months of getting the date wrong.

Just had a DOT physical for a job. They had to go the whole 9 yards, hernia and everything. I'm ok, but if there are any ladies out there, I need to be held.

While in the waiting room for the physical, they had "When Harry Met Sally" on the TV. Good movie, perhaps on the the best "Movie Your Girlfriend Probably Dragged You to See" movies, and Meg Ryan is kind of hot, good combo.

Also, yesterday, saw parts of "Biodome." Amazing, it might be the first I was 100% right about how bad a movie was, maybe one funny line, which is bad when its supposed to be a comedy.

It has come to my attention that the other day was Eliza Dushku's birthday. Man, I'd strangle a dolphin to get with her.

Well, that was the one funny line, so if you haven't already seen Biodome, save yourself the time.

I film people's asses, and I'm gone.

December 30th, 2002
Just saw Minority Report on DVD this morning, cool as shit, seriously. I thought it would be a lame action movie, but its really good. If you like 12 Monkeys, you'd like Minority Report.

Well, the rest of this update is commercial free.

Once again, Open Mic Night tonight, go there. New performers tonight, I promise, new songs, this Monday at 8:30/7:30 central.

Nobody will get that.

I'm off for two days, lets party.

December 29th, 2002
Well, in a couple of days, this website will span two years, sounds better than 7 months.

Saw "Catch Me if You Can" the other night, good film, you should catch it, if you can (sorry). I'm sure I make fun of Leonardo DiCaprio as much as the next heterosexual, but he was really good in the film, and Tom Hanks, the guys from Bosom Buddies did really good in a role he knows he isn't going to get nominated for. The only thing is, Nico taped this thing with the real Frank Abagnale (the guy the movie is about) and he looks nothing like Leonardo Dicaprio. Looks like somebody is trying to glamorize his past by having the Tiger Beat man of the year portray him. All of the girls who know him when he was young will now be fooled to think he looked like DiCaprio, as opposed to Elliot Smith.

I have heard split opinions on "Gangs of New York." Its really long so if you know if it is good or bad, please tell me so I don't waste my time if it is really bad. I haven't even seen a commercial for it, so I don't even know what it is about.

I want to add a name to a list I was making with Brian earlier this weekend, Selma Hayek.

I was at this party, and if it was a color, it would be blue (get it?). Either way, if I don't update tomorrow, go to the Java Joint for Open Mic, for Brian, Nico, and a special guest...me. Who knows, possibly Katie if Brian ever apologizes for snubbing her.

Miss me while I'm gone.

December 25th, 2002
Merry Christmas baby!

Well, what have we done, another year over. Well, actually, you still have a week to make this year count, so do something or John Lennon will be pissed at you.

Got a lot of cool stuff for Christmas, should be even cooler when I return it for stuff that fits.

Well, just saying Merry Christmas, happy Chanukah (3 weeks ago), Happy Kwanza, and a very merry Festivus for the rest of you.

Well, time to think of resolutions, later.

December 23rd, 2002
Hey, its the day before the day before Christmas, or perhaps just Monday.

Comedy Central played the 6 Clerks cartoon episodes that sort of aired on ABC during the summer Survivor debuted. Problem was, ABC only aired two episodes, and out of order. Trust me, if you have seen them in order, there would have been twice as many jokes. Don't know if its coming on again, but they are funny, just like just about anything Kevin Smith has done. Only one of the episodes are actually similar to the type of moive Clerks was though, which actually is a running joke on the show.

Joe Strummer died yesterday, bummer. But seriously, the music world mourns his lost even if the industry doesn't. The Clash was one of those bands that gave credibility to Punk so 20 years later stoner high school and college kids like Blink 182, The Used, or Bowling for Cereal could destroy it. In fact, I think the song, "Taste of Ink" by the Used is listed as the cause of death. Either way, I won't go into this anymore since is probably the third time on the site you have read about Joe Strummer.

Hey, here comes the Wooster, you know he ain't gonna die. Good job on the movie Rory. It was much better than the Big Budget Mario Brothers movie, and on top of that, it was good too.

Well, haven't been to the Java Joint much these last few months, now twice in a row. Yup, since Brian and Nico are back, so is Open Mic, be there or be on my list of people who I am severely disappointed in.

Who knows, maybe I'll play

...a joke on somebody.

Then again, probably not.

December 19th, 2002
Well, your fourth favorite member of the site has only one job now. Yes, I quit the restaurant, it was my last day today. Yes, I know you don't care, but fuck off, its a big day for me.

After tomorrow the "peak" season for UPS is over, and so are my classes, so I'll be relatively free from this weekend on for a month or so.

So who is getting drunk this weekend (Josh raising his hand). No I'm not buying anything, its my weekend off, I have shit already, better be on the invite list if you want some.

It's spelled Channukah, not Hannekuh Katie, jewhater.

If you haven't yet, watch "The Last Dragon," you'll thank me.

I was asked earlier this week, "How much would could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?" I am kind of embarrassed that both I didn't remember the answer then, and that I even know the answer. Either way the answer is, "A woodchuck would chuch all the wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood."

Eh, go ahead if you can handle it.

Don't worry, you weren't supposed to get that.

So long my friend, until we meeeeet again.

December 16th, 2002
Oh man, not a good day in the life of yours truly.

Its the last full week before Christmas, so UPS is at its busiest, meaning I'm waking up at my earliest. It sucks quite a bit. You should see me, I look strung out on dope or something. Even my teacher asked me if I was ok.

Either way, if I am rude to anybody this week, I am apologizing now, buecause if I see you, I will probably be in a bad mood already. I am the word people generally use to describe teething infants, cranky.

Either way, thats all, may not update again until the weekend, so later.

December 12th, 2002
It has come to my attention Katie has no clue what she is talking about, especially when it comes to Seinfeld.

Over my goddamned dead body will Brian put up a bootleg trade section on the site, well, come to thinkg about it, why not let him?

Less than two weeks to Christmas, meaning UPS won't suck so much. Speaking of wh ich, UPS turned down my idea to change their slogan "What Can Brown Do For You?" to "Check Out my Package" or perhaps "Do I Have a Package For You!" Something in their rejection about that being perhaps the 19347th time somebody has made those suggestions.

Hmm, hey I don't want to sound like a queer or anything, but my job title is called "Package Handler," they seriously have to change the name of that. And remember, its never funny to make fun of somebody for something they just made fun of themselves for.

If you haven't seen "The Last Dragon," see it, unless that is you hate half black half asian martial artists only looking to find the wisdom of the guy who writes the fortunes to fortune cookies.

I perhaps saw the cheapest thing in the world today, I was getting a haircut when a guy comes in to get one too. He askes the hair stylist if he could plug in his charger to charge his phone. When done, he says something to his kid about saving on the electricity bill. Cheap mother fucker, a full sized fridge costs about $58 a year to run 24 hours a day, that charger might have saved him half a penny, ugh!

More snow next week I hear, I hear tings, I hear tings.

So long jerkass.

December 11th, 2002
Hello, this is Joshua "Nothing at all like George Costanza" Ungerleider.

Strawberry Fields was very interesting. It was cool to see people of all races and creeds come together to sing Beatle songs. Well, not all races and creeds, actually it was like 50% white, 49% asian, and 1% John Lennon look alikes.

The only problem with the day was that a woman had a seizure very early on, and a bunch of people were playing Beatle songs, personally I think they should perhaps have not played as the First Aid squad was helping the woman, at least not played the song, "Help."

Other than that, it was cool, I now know where Winchester Building is at in New Haven.

If you didn't know, I rule at pool.

Also, Gallagher made a performance at Strawberry Fields, not Liam or Noel, the comic, Gallagher.

Not really.

Dover Rd. is So Toms River, so Toms River, how are you doing?

So long.

December 6th, 2002
Tomorrow is the anniversary of Pearl Harbor, and the Day after is when John Lennon was shot, what a depressing fucking weekend.

Speaking of Lennon, it was pretty cool of Brian to dedicate "Working Class Hero," Lennon's own song, to one John Lennon.

In an unrelated story, creativity is not from the McCaskill side of the family.

Hmm, lets see, almost 10 inches of snow last night and what did some people do, drink, and then what, drive, and then what, well, the got home safely but that doesn't make it alright.

If you buy anybody a Teddy Bear for Christmas, for the love of God, don't open it up, the store won't take it back if you opened the bear up, or so I'm told.

Oddly enough, before I read Brian's update, I was think of cool music to listen to when it snows. That "Baby its cold outside" song is an obvious, and for some reason, Track 1 off of Pearl Jams's Riot Act, "Can't Keep" was really cool yesterday with the trees already coated but with more snow falling. Worst song when its snowing, "Sunny Sunshine from the Sunny Sun Sun" by Jimmy Sun and the Sunny 6. Actually that song is pretty bad in any weather.

Forget the E! Channel ticker, they are all bad. They started after 9/11 when there was just so much news they needed to tell you right away. Now even on CNN they are using the Ticker to tell you the name of the Turkey that George Bush "pardoned" on Thanksgiving.

In a vastly different way than Elton John, I'm out.

December 3rd, 2002
Well, after all the controversey stirred up by my last update, I decided to take a few days off.

I spell names wrong, hey, thats just what I do.

Sunday is December 8th, mark your calenders.

Christmas is coming, but not as fast as Chanukah, oh goy!

I really had nothing to say today, just bored, anybody who knows how to work that Monster.Com webengine to give you relevant results, email me.

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